Jokes

Make me laugh

*tickles resin* laughing? or do i have to pull out my best jokes



<---- rocks eyebrow

i laughed k

Hahahah i laughed, was expecting a joke:)

still thinking, its been a while since i told a joke later on tonight maybe when im drunk

ZOMG NOT THE RED CORDIAL

hahaha NOT THE RED CORDIAL

ok i funny what gets laid more than my dad......

Don't know what does?

me

Hahahaha Your cat doesn't count m8.

I SAID ME NOT MY CAT U MOFU

Hahahahaha i thought your cat was the one getting it all

oh is that how it is, is it? well bring it. me and you. shop2 rush server today at 2113, 36 seconds, 19 milliseconds and 56 millimilliseconds.

rebel wrote:

oh is that how it is, is it? well bring it. me and you. shop2 rush server today at 2113, 36 seconds, 19 milliseconds and 56 millimilliseconds.

the last one is one onehundreds of a second

nope. your wrong. what do u do for a living btw?

Lol not english

k got a great joke from yahoo jokes... i mean i made it up myself...



Two businessmen were sitting down for a break in their soon to be new store. As yet, the store wasn't ready, with only a few shelves set up.
One said to the other, 'I bet that any minute now some idiot is going to walk by, put his face to the window and ask what we're selling.'
No sooner were the words out of his mouth when, sure enough, a curious fellow walked to the window, had a peek, and asked 'Excuse me, what are you selling here?'
One of the businessmen replied sarcastically, 'We're selling ar$e-holes.'

Without skipping a beat, the fellow said, 'You are doing well ...
Only two left!'

Hahahahahah i like that , not the ending i thought.

A guy walks into a bar, sits down and has a drink. Suddenly, a man hollers at him, ''I screwed your mom last night!'' Disturbed, the man tries to ignore him.
Again, he hears, ''Your mom was good in bed last night!'' Again, he tries to ignore it.

The man is just about to speak again but the guy stops him and says, ''Dad, go home, you're drunk!''

An old Italian man lived alone in the country. He wanted to dig his tomato garden but it was very hard work as the ground was hard. His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:

Dear Vincent,
I am feeling pretty badly because it looks like I won't be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me.

Love, Dad

A few days later he received a letter from his son:

Dear Dad,
Don't dig up that garden. That's where I buried the bodies.

Love, Vinnie

At
4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left. That same day the old man received another letter from his son:

Dear Dad,
Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That's the best I could do under the circumstances.
Love you, Vinnie

An explorer was walking through the jungle and suddenly, he found himself surrounded by dangerous cannibals. "I'm dead," said the explorer.

Then, a bright light came from the sky and a voice from the sky said, "Not yet, take your knife, and cut the throat of the leader."

The explorer did what the voice said. The cannibals began to scream.

The voice from the sky said, "NOW, you are dead."

Hahahahaah I like those too "laughing out lol"

The prison one is great

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket.

What's black and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

What's white and blue and if it falls out of a tree it'll kill ya? A fridge wearing a denim jacket.


Lol the last one

What do you get if you cross a Poofter and a Dinosaur? Amegasauarse.